
Building a better you through your life experiences. Take your past and learn from your mistakes. Grow, achieve and believe for it is already yours. You just have to do the work.
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Welcome everybody. You are listening to reflect to redeem episode 101.
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Why help you reflect to redeem your life. I'm your host Mentor Mel. And today's episode be something that everyone can
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work on no matter the age or economic status.
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And that is developing a better you.
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So I was talking to a friend today.
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and I realize that
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What you truly believe?
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you are
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for instance if I believe
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That and I mean not just I say.
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You know, I believe it. No, we are talking like
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It is in your soul.
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It is in your being.
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It is in you walk.
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The way you talk how you present yourself?
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all of these things
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when you
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Believe it.
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You can achieve it when you especially if you write it down.
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You write it down. You are just
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Signing your fate. This is for me. This is mine.
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One of my friends
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Really got in on her.
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today because
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I know what she can do.
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and I know what she's been doing.
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After this conversation I had with her today.
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She has the potential.
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to be very
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Very good. She's smart.
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She's smarter than I am.
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She can do it. but when you let others
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determine your worth
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determine
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What you can do what they feel you should have.
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Why you should have that?
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If you let them dictate.
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That On You
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When you let them dictate that on you then you become that.
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You listen, people will forever always.
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and for always have their opinion of you once you start believing that
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Is when you start to run into trouble.
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Especially if it's negative.
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like I
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Make it a point.
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To look at the better of a situation regardless of what it is. You don't get this job. Well
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What are ways you can better yourself?
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From this interview to the next interview.
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Become more technically sound.
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How do you do that?
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Do you touch things that?
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Especially the things that they questioned you on do you now go back and your notes? Okay. Let me write that down. I will.
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Do that.
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Next time I'll do some research on that and continue on.
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What are you going to do from the past time?
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To the current to make it better door to the Future to make it better.
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Especially if you did not get what you were searching for.
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a lot of times people get discouraged
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What type of great thing was achieved without actually doing the work. How do you you can't become the greatest player
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alive without actually getting your ass beat by somebody like you have to
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at that point
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You have to be disgusted.
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with loss
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To where you will do you do the work to prevent it from happening.
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Kobe Bryant Francis this man
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Have you some examples before Kobe Bryant rehearses rehearses rehearses his moves before even a game anywhere near a
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practice in or near a game. He himself.
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muscle memory
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greatest player
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to play whatever instrument
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When I tell you I play that you miss before.
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When I tell you when you play you have these runs that you got to like go through and you know, it's tough.
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What are you do you practice it over and over and over because at some point in time your fingers will now remember?
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That run without a problem. You will master that run.
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remember in a band marching band
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There was like 20 clarinet.
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Mind you I wasn't the best.
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When it came to play the clarinet, however, I can March my ass off. I was a great marcher. So when it came time in the
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music for there to be a good run together.
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My marching hey down.
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but now the sound
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We're trying to display the sounds of the Audis. They can't hear us. You know, why because there's only two people that
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can actually play The Run.
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What do I have to do to become on the level of the two people that can actually play actually practices thing to wear.
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This is now a not a choke moment, but oh I got this.
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That's how you have to view whatever struggle.
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That you are dealing with. Interviews now I'm solid like I'm not going to say I'm the best person ever. However.
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I like conversing with people. I like talking to people.
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Just so happens. I have to sell myself. I'm not a salesperson by any means. However, I do know my stuff.
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I'm not the best at it.
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I'm pretty damn good in the best part about me is.
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Where I am working on something.
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That leaves room for growth. I'm not saying I'm the best. So now I'm not but I'm not above learning this little small
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thing. I have now. I'm at a point where yes, I'm good.
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I could be great.
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are there resources that allow me to learn even more so
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making yourself
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The best you can be requires repetition.
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work
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You might cry I cried.
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Just a termination.
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Make it.
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Have fun as creepy as I say have fun in the process of becoming a better you nobody else can do it.
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Everybody got the statue on what they think you should be.
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or
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How far you should go? However, you start again if you start to believe those things.
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You won't get as far as you can go with my friend. She's believed all these other people and I'm like
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What are you doing? You've been this position one position for 4 years.
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Did you have not?
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You've been overlooked and I when you say Overlook because it requires you to actually put for put your foot forward to do
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it.
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She was comfortable just complacency that all why didn't deserve it. Who says that you don't deserve it.
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Who told you that for you to solidify and validate that?
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Actual statement I give that statement no life because you know, why?
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If I don't deserve it.
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Now I'm going to work for it when it does come up again. I got it.
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When you sit back.
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When you sit back.
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Be prepared for other people to step forward and move fast you like they're going to go ahead and take it. They're not
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waiting for you to be like what she finally got it. Okay now is give her the position No they want you to earn it. They
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want you to appreciate it. They want you to actually they want to feel that you will do.
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Your utmost best in that position like they view you in the position that you're working in and they see how complacent
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you are. How just
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Not involved you are that stuff.
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Is what they see, so of course when it comes time for a promotion say well, I mean she's not really doing this job with
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why would we put her up for the next one?
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You got to actually put forth the effort.
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To get what you want.
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If there is a position if someone else got it before you then is not is not a big.
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Issue and talking to the person who did the hiring well.
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In what ways can I become better to next time be considered for the promotion It's all about wording too
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You don't want to be in attacking mode. You want to be in the more understanding. Hey, I want to try and get better type deal
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of you because you altimate Lee want you should want to get better if you want to stay where you are.
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the be happy
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What's the pay that you're getting how you're being treated the hours you're working all that great stuff.
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simple as that
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Put in the work.
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Enjoy the process.
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of becoming a better you
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That's what happened overnight. It's not something you go. See in a month is not something you would see in a year.
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Is something you will feel?
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It's not something you see I can physically change all day.
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however, my mental growth my personal growth my
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my professional growth that stuff.
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You don't see you feel the difference just even a conversation with somebody if you didn't know technical terms, this that and
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the other?
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And it was a struggle for you to keep up in a conversation.
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now you
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You're in the same conversation with a different group of people and now you're actually engaging you're putting your
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opinion out there. It's all relevant to the conversation. You don't feel lost. That's your growth. That's the growth that
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you feel.
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If they even with in a professional setting arm the first time I went to like a big networking event.
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to do wholesaling of houses. Mind you I am
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by myself
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I never
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First off. I'm a very shy person surprisingly.
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Especially when I first meet people
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I really I feel like I've outgrown it.
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So now I'm in a position where I'm around like all these.
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It was like a hundred people that were all trying to, you know, do wholesaling and get their business all set in there. I
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am just like
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What have I stepped into?
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I paid money now. I'm listening to this. I see this person. All right, cool.
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I find is one person I talk to.
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All right quick stick with them. We're good Nahh they left me.
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they left me
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fast forward again
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to an event
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I would say was probably about six months ago.
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Mind you that first event I went to the outside was in my
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Maybe like 23.
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2223
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Now I'm 29 in this event. I'm just okay.
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We're taking this whole networking. Thanks a whole nother level.
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Meeting these different people now you're realizing the actual.
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The point of meeting all these other people contacts contacts contacts.
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That's the thing that you once you realize.
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Your purpose there what you're supposed to be doing there. Then you realize the point of it.
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Just to know the growth then.
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Just to feel the growth from when I was first in that situation to where I am now.
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that took
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6 years
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6 years
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Not saying I wasn't I wasn't purposely trying to work on it, but
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Now I'm back in this environment.
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Here's what I did wrong the first time. Let me better myself.
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That's what it takes to become a better you you personally have to realize the work.
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That needs to be done
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or you need to realize how uncomfortable you felt in this environment and now
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I'm back in this how am I going to better myself to be able to?
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Not feel uncomfortable to be able to stand with.
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and to be able to contribute
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Focus
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A lot of these young kids nowadays they are too busy.
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focusing on other people
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Too busy focusing on with this person have or too busy.
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trying to keep up with this person and
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What is the social media big hype challenge thing is like?
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You've got to tune it all out because you know what at the end of the day. It does not affect you on a one-on-one level.
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I hope you all Implement some of these suggestions remember to work on a better you begins with y o and you until we meet
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again, this is Melanie McFadden in Mentor Mill signing off.
Version: 20241125
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